I'd seek mental health councillors because I strongly suspect you're carrying burdens which cloud your thinking. I felt like this, I sought help to look at my emotional state, and it improved things significantly.
Which economy are you in which pays subsistence wages to academics? Not having a phd limits your access to tenured roles of course, but your skills should command a premium.
Again, without knowing you or anything about you it is possible you interview badly, or do not present well on paper, which again demands professional help. This too has been a bugbear for me, I interview terribly. But I am now late stage end of career, content, and I put a lot of it down to some constructive introspection, CBT and the associated professional mental health.
Don't forget your physical health either: good sleep and exercise is vital.
1) Don't let your experience or lack there off keep you from applying to jobs. You have a hard to find skill set and recruiters don't often have a clue about how much experience is really needed.
2) Have you thought of doing remote contracting work for US companies, if you can pull this off you don't have to move or get a green card or visa?
3) Try getting on with one of the H1B visa consulting companies and see if they can get you something, this maybe very difficult but it is something that comes to mind.
Keep going with your shitty job, gain experience and keep trying. I don't know anything about options in your specific niche but in general with some experience it's usually easier to land a good job than directly after graduation, esp. during an economic downturn. Things might already look much better 1-2 years down the line.
Alternatively bite the other kind of bullet and be more flexible in what kind of job you apply to, with a bit of luck you might even like doing something else as much as what you do now.
> the economy in Europe is really just shitting itself and will likely only deteriorate in the coming years
I call bullshit, there is no reason why it can't recover.
Take the job for now. Do you get exposure to the managing the cluster itself? Like at the hardware level or storage/job scheduler? Or are you a user and just processing the code to run? The HPC infra jobs are in demand in the US with the AI craze. I think PhD is a waste of time personally, just focus on practical experience.
Which economy are you in which pays subsistence wages to academics? Not having a phd limits your access to tenured roles of course, but your skills should command a premium.
Again, without knowing you or anything about you it is possible you interview badly, or do not present well on paper, which again demands professional help. This too has been a bugbear for me, I interview terribly. But I am now late stage end of career, content, and I put a lot of it down to some constructive introspection, CBT and the associated professional mental health.
Don't forget your physical health either: good sleep and exercise is vital.
Best wishes.
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